Dad in Heaven

July 2, 2018. My dad, Sam Evetts, passed away. He was 75 years old, had 12 grandkids, and was married to mom for 38 years. He had a happy marriage and lived a full life. And I am still amazed that he died on my moms birthday!!! He worshiped my mom, and I just love that she greeted him in Heaven on her birthday. God orchestrates every detail so beautifully in His timing! 

We had his memorial service at our church, MDUMC. Then, we had a family/close friends reception at Carmelo's restaurant. Dad donated his body to science. He was giving till the end...he had hopes of his body educating medical students or finding the cure for kidney disease! So, we had huge pictures displayed at his service, then filled the restaurant with pictures throughout his life.

Dad got a kidney transplant 17 years ago. Although it lasted WAY longer than expected, it did fail after 16 years. So, the last year or so he has been struggling on dialysis. It was painfully hard on him from day 1. Dialysis broke him down. He was so frail. Bedridden and immobile for the past 8 months. To say he struggled is a huge understatement. He moved from his beloved senior living apartment into a skilled nursing home months ago. He needed around the clock care. His health declined from there.

He fell (when he still lived alone in senior living apartment) on Thanksgiving 2017. He broke his hip and never recovered. He was taken to dialysis by ambulance 3 times a week from that point on. He was never comfortable and wanted out of his own body for so long! However, his gentle heart and kind spirit remained.

I visited him often, but he didn't have the energy for visits over an hour. He was in and out of confusion. In and out of sleep. The toxins in his body from kidney failure was getting the best of him. But, he still fought until he couldn't fight anymore! We called in hospice and he passed just 3 days later. I have been my dads "protector" and caretaker for 13 years (since mom passed away.) He has been sick a while. He has needed me daily for most of my adult life. So, I was there until the end! God gave us a great gift with his final days. Dad was clear and able to visit with so many. He had a ton of visitors. Lots of time outside in the sunshine, lots of stories and music! Let me tell you....this man danced his way into Heaven...literally!

I laid on his bed, played music as he bounced his shoulders, twitched his eyes and wiggled his fingers (as if he was playing the piano!) He even reached for my hand to "spin" me while he danced. He was moaning to the words. He knew what I was playing. So, I played all his favorites. The nurse said, "he is having his last party!" I played the song he played mom on the piano every night (You Needed Me, by Anne Murray.) I told him "it's time you go dad. Go play this song for moms birthday." He moaned and nodded his head 'yes.' He literally fell into a coma right then and died SO very peacefully hours later. God's timing was glorified.

We were a well oiled machine, we kept each other going,and we were undeniably close in all my years of devotion to dad. A few months ago, he told me..."you have fought for me until your knuckles have bled. It is time you let go- so I can let go." So, I spent the night with him. The morning of July 2, I told dad "I have to go pick up the kids real quick. I'll be right back." I kissed his peaceful body. Then, he died 14 minutes later. He always told me "I won't let go until you do." So, I have now let go. Let go of my dad who was so ready to be in peace. He was ready, so I was ready.

My years of being his caretaker has ended. I asked dad, "what am I going to do with my time when you're gone?" And he said, "you're gonna breathe. Just breathe!" I have mourned the loss of my dad months ago. He has been gone for a while...his body has been here, but his fight drained him. I don't mourn his passing....because his passing gave him freedom. I mourn being parentless. But that too gives me peace because my parents are protecting and guiding me, hand in hand in Heaven.

Dad...you were the best. Simply amazing. Dad planned his funeral. He told me what hymns he wanted played. And that he wanted everyone to walk out to "Happy Trails" by Roy Rogers. Then, he wanted a reception full of FUN! Dancing, good music, drinks, food, family and friends. Well, dad...you would be proud! We did everything you requested and it was perfection! We love you and will forever honor your memory!